I totally understand and sympathize. If I were rich, I'd just pay off your loan for you because no honest hard working self employed person needs to be treated like crap like that. Banks have no interest in helping the small business man or woman. They only care about institutional clients with economies the size of California.
Why don't you publicize the name of this bank and blog about your bad experience? Maybe if enough people hear stories like this, they'll take their business to other banks.